Nintendo E3 Conference

Ellie's inside the auditorium and we'll be ready to go at 5pm BST.

Good morning, Nintendo fans! And non-Nintendo fans who are just here to complain.

We are in the Nokia Theatre, or "Nokeyaa Theerder" as it's pronounced here in sunny LA. Where it's actually a bit grey this morning, but misty LA just doesn't have the same ring to it.

Curiously, the stage and surrounding areas are lit with a sort of PlayStation blue rather than traditional Nintendo red. Or perhaps they're paying tribute and it's a Eurogamer blue? Perhaps.

The conference is pretty packed. Haven't spotted any big names yet though.

Wonder what's going on backstage right now. Just picture the scene: Cammie checking her white trouser suit for stains, Reggie practicing his pronunciation of "Maorio", Iwata fiddling anxiously with his Vitality Sensor...

They are keeping us entertained, theoretically, with multiple choice trivia questions on the big screen. It's like Who Wants to be a Millionaire?, except ironically, we can't win anything, and everyone at Nintendo IS a millionaire!

Who is the creator of Dragon Quest, trivia fans?

Yep, Yuji Hori. Well done. You win nothing.

(Back to Gibbo.) It will be very interesting to see how Nintendo will respond to yesterday's revelations, what with Ubisoft doing a Vitality Sensor and Microsoft doing a... Well, everything really.

(Housekeeping announcement! We have previews of a bunch of big games - XCOM! True Crime! The Force Unleashed II! Guitar Hero 78! - going live at 6pm BST, so if you're interested in those look for them there in an hour.)

What would you like to see, readers? New Zelda? More Mario? Don't know about you, but I am crossing my fingers for Women's Murder Club 2!

What is the number of years an average player has been playing videogames, trivia fans?

12 years! Just imagine that.

I am sitting next to GamesIndustry.biz editor Matt Martin again. What are your predictions for the Nintendo conference, Matt? "They've got to show new Zelda, or there will be violence in the seats. Fanboys will start throwing them at Reggie."

Matt is also predicting some nice pie charts about women and old people. "I'm hoping for pie charts, but I'll settle for a graph." Top industry analysis there.

Wonder if Michael Pachter is here? What can you see in your wondrous crystal ball, Michael? "He's probably predicting a 4DS right now," says Matt.

Apparently the first game to incorporate Wii MotionPlus technology was Virtua Tennis 2009. This means I will have to make a call to the Guinness Book of Records shortly and inform them that the spread I turned in last week is factually inaccurate.

Wonder if Miyamoto's here? Wonder if he's going to the APB party tonight? We've heard there's going to be a topless band. Almost certainly, then.

Wonder if Nintendo will try to match Microsoft's stunt yesterday by giving everyone here a free 3DS? Or a free HD Wii? Or a free Satoru Iwata?

It's starting! There's a big countdown on the screen. 10...9...8...

Reggie's here! Looking dapper in a suit that probably isn't from Mr Byrite.

"For gamers, this is the best week of the year. You can just feel the buzz in the air, and as usual, that buzz begins with technology."

"The headlines just seem to spin on technology. But this morning, let me adjust that perspective just a little bit, because technology is only a tool. The end product, the thing that does matter, is the experience." Well said, Don Mattress! Oh hang on

"Here at E3, with thousands of people battling to see and try everything at once, considering the experience is the only real way to make sense of it all. We intend to show you how Nintendo, once again, is raising the bar" DING DING DING you can tick off raising the bar on your Buzzword Bingo card.

It's a Zelda trailer! There's Link, standing in a field!

He draws his sword, then his bow and arrow. It's called The Legend of Zelda Skyward Sword.

Miyamoto is on-screen now. "I think this game will be remembered as a key turning point in Zelda's history."

He's holding that sword and shield again.

They have turned into the Wii remote and nunchuk now. "With a sword this light, you can move it around as you like."

MotionPlus will be used for selecting items - press the B button.

A bloke called Bill [Trinen] is on stage now. The Miyamoto video has finished. Bill's showing us how Zelda works.

MotionPlus turns the remote into your sword.

Miyamoto just burst onto the stage. He's here after all!

"You know what, I think I'll explain it myself." Probably best.

"Just imagine you are holding a sword and a shield yourself." Z to lock-on, C to shield bash, A to put your sword away.

Miyamoto shows how you can swing and slash your sword. Pressing Z targets.

On-screen, Link is in a woodland glade, populated by some big funky mushrooms. Dare you to eat one, Link. Then play the Mario Kart Rainbow Road track.

Now Link is slashing away at them big flowers with the gaping mouths and razor-sharp teeth that Freud would probably find really interesting,

You can do swing attacks by swinging both hands together in the same direction.

Link's found a door with an eye in it. Stab the eye, Link!

Or yeh just confuse it by waving your sword around.

Now he's using the shield bash move to knock projectiles back towards an enemy, by jerking the nunchuk.

Link is facing enemies who can block attacks now. He swings his sword to get around this.

The visuals look very traditional - green grass, blue skies, brown earth, that sort of things.

He's showing us item selection now. You hold down B to put your hand in your pocket, i.e. bring up a selection wheel.

Then you can select bombs, arrows, slingshots and the like.

You don't have to point at the screen to aim - you just move the remote in front of you as if you're aiming a real slingshot. Or something.

Pressing A puts bombs on the ground.

You can throw them by flicking the Wii remote.

You can also roll them like bowling balls. Lethal, death-bearing bowling balls, obviously.

"We're having a little interference here. Is somebody out there using wireless?" Er not us honest.

Bow and arrow now - Miyamoto is holding the controllers like an actual bow and arrow. "It looks like we're having trouble with the wireless." It does a bit.

You can make a beetle fly around. It's also used to pick up items. Link sends it flying over a high ledge.

Miyamoto is controlling the bettle by twisting the Wii remote. Now he's switching to the whip. You can use it to cut grass and batter enemies. You can switch easily back to your sword.

"I can assure you that when you play it on the show floor, everything plays very smoothly and clearly." Pesky wireless issues, eh?

Development "looks like it's going to take through the end of this year" - so you can look forward to playing the new Zelda "next year".

Video now: Link slashing away at enemies, chopping down trees, fighting scorpions, swinging on ropes, climbing vines, firing arrows.

Flying the beetle, rolling bombs, shooting bats, whipping more scorpions, And Reggie's back.

"The Legend of Zelda Skyward Sword is just the top line of our E3 story today. There's a lot more to come." Women's Murder Club 2???

Oh. It's time for the bit about women and old people. Entertainment crossing gender age etc etc.

Now he's listing sports games. Eh? NBA Jam. Whooping.

An exclusive NBA Jam for Wii will be on the show floor.

It's Maorio! He's playing beach volleyball on the big screen against Yoshi and Peach.

Donkey Kong wielding an ice hockey stick now.

Bowser lobbing bombs, Luigi shooting hoops. Looks like a new Mario Sports effort?

Mario Sports Mix is the title. Coming in 2011.

"Maorio Sports Mix is pure fun," says Reggie. A fun magnet? "Last year you heard people predict that Wii momentum was starting to wane." Is it graphtime?

"But then we sold billions of Wiis to Americans innit!" (Paraphrasing)

"Then we sold loads of games because that is how we roll muchachos" (Still paraphrasing)

More people intend to buy a Wii than the other platforms combined, apparently.

It's not the case that people buy Wii Fit then lose interest, says Reggie.

First lifestyle photo of the show! It's got women in and everything!"

He's talking about bridge titles, like Mario Kart and NSMB Wii. 22m and 14m sold respectively.

The next bridge title "begins with more than 177 million Mii characters created around the world". It's Wii Party.

Video now. Gorgeous people in lifestyle lounges. There's a board game island - looks a bit like Mario Party but with Wiis.

13 party games, over 70 different mini-games. Coming "this holiday".

It will drive social interaction, says Reggie. Just Dance! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Glad I didn't say that out loud

Just Dance video now. Just Dance 2! This is even better than Women's Murder Club 2!

40 plus tracks. The PussyCat Dolls are playing. When I grow up, I certainly do indeed want to have boobies.

Up to eight players.

Coming "fall" 2010, exclusively for Wii. (Tom can you put a pre-order in for me while I'm doing this ta)

Golden Sun is now subtitled Dark Dawn.

Video: Big-headed blonde kids running round villages, mountains etc.

Some sort of plasma ball has turned the world all dark. You must sort it all out.

Golden Sun Dark Dawn is arriving this holiday season.

Come on Reggie, show us your 3DS! I've brought my red and green glasses!

Hang on - GOLDENEYE.

Video of men in a boardroom discussing what made GE great.

"A new Goldeneye game is coming up." Bond theme. Rainy scene, explosions, first-person gunfights.

Split-screen and online multiplayer. Jaws, Oddjob. Special modes; Paintball, melee.

Looks like Craig David's likeness is in there. Sorry Daniel Craig.

"I remember it, you remember it," says Reggie. I dunno, most of the nineties are a total blur for me.

"Activision's new Goldeneye, exclusive to Wii, this holiday."

Mickey Mouse is on screen now.

"Now this universally recognised and beloved character embarks on a new chapter." Epic Mickey? Yep. Warren Spector is here. He's not trying the hilarious mouse ears trick again.

Nice sweater vest, Warren! It's like Chandler is IN THE ROOM.

We're seeing in-game footage. Mickey is running around "Wasteland - a world both familiar and strange".

Specifically, he's in the Ventureland quest zone. This is where you learn about quests and buy stuff. Mickey is talking to Smee about an optional side-quest.

Other characters from Peter Pan are in this bit, including some theme park locations like the Swiss Family Robinson Tree House.

We're watching Mickey use paint and thinner to change the environment. He can erase characters, objects, walls, plants, even the ground.

But can he draw big nobs on the walls?

All very nice, but I'd rather see Epic Tony Hart. Or possibly Epic Neil Buchanan.

Action zones now. You'll have to visit the booth to learn more about those. Righto.

Travel zones take Mickey from one part of the wasteland to another. They're side-scrolling areas. This one's black and white - it's inspired by Steamboat Willy.

"Walt himself once said, it's kind of fun to do the impossible."

Warren's finishing up. Bye, Warren! Hello again, Reggie!

There's an exclusive e3.nintendo.com interview between Iwata and Spector, says Reg.

He's talking about Sakurai now, the guy behind Smash Bros. and Kirby.

I never noticed how much Kirby looks like a shaved bollock before.

Kirby's back! Freshly shaved!

"Spin a yarn in a way that yarn has never been spun before" what?

Kirby's Epic Yarn. It's Kirby cross-stitch!

2D side-scroller. Kirby appears to be made of wool himself. He can wield wool like a whip to grab things. He can change shape - a parachute, a car, a surfboard, a UFO.

The environments are all pastel and very pretty.

Even enemies are made of wool outline - here's a big dragon, there's a flaming phoenix.

Looks lovely and woolly. It's for the Wii.

Reggie says the main difference is not the way new Kirby looks, but works. Slated for release this autumn.

Moving on to Dragon Quest now. 4.2 millioin copies of IX sold in Japan.

"Chico, maybe the top dragon quest fan in our treehouse, has now logged maybe 140 game hours." Is Chico here???

Oh. DQ IX is coming to the US in "just 26 days". "And then on the last day of August, passionate players on Wii will experience a signature moment with an old friend." Metroid Other M.

Was really hoping it was Chico time, but it's running round space corridors and getting in lifts time.

General footage of running, shooting, jumping, getting in lifts.

Reggie says it's all about isolation and exploration. What about the lifts?

August 31st release date - for the US, presumably. [Yep. Autumn in Europe, unless they update it in the post-show press pack! -Ed]

Holy moley. Donkey Kong's back!

Massive whooping. DK swinging on vines, collecting bananas. Mine Kart race!

Even the music's the same! It's like it's 1996 all over again! Side-scrolling. Looks just like the SNES games. Very lush, detailed, pretty and generally brilliant. Donkey Kong Country Returns is the title. THIS HOLIDAY.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA this is almost as good as Just Dance 2.

Sounds like it's time for the 3DS now.

Reggie is winding up. But with what? "We're not just raising the bar, but extending that bar far into the distance." 3DS logo on screen.

Photo of family wearing glasses on sofa. They look stupid. "There's nothing to watch yet or play on big screen 3D" says Reggie. "But most of all, it's the glasses. Man, those glasses!"

"And that kind of fashion forward statement doesn't come cheap." Oooh burrrrn! "We think there's a better way... Take 3D along with you wherever you go." "Ample game content available the first day on the market. And best of all, no glasses."

Video. Some sort of montage of human history in its entirety.

"Now - nothing between you and the experience." Nintendo Kinect! No wait

3DS! The stage has gone all red. Dry ice!

It's rising up out of the floor. This is bonkers.

Hang on it's an empty pillar. Has the 3DS been nicked?

Iwata is here. Haha, he picked it up off the pillar! It's that slim!

You couldn't see it from the floor.

He's holding up the 3DS. It's turquoise. Two screens. Analog nubbin above d-pad.

The upper screen has 3.5 inch widescreen display.

Can easily be held in one hand, would probably fit in a back pocket.

The case looks like it's metallic and shiny.

He tucks it inside his jacket.

On the top half there's a 3D depth slider - you can maximise the 3D, remove it altogether or go inbetween.

3DS is a successor to DS, so it naturally has a touch screen. However, "We realised that fignerprints and other smudges reduce the 3D image"

"In other words, a touch screen and 3D screen do not get along very well. So we decided to employ a touch panel only on the bottom."

They have improved the graphics capability of the hardware. "Something tells me this might cause a lot of enthusiasm in the development community."

Controls now. "We installed the slide pad, designed for analogue play." There's also a motion sensor and a gyroscope.

"It has compatibility with DSi, 3DS has a camera too, but look - there's not one but two camera lenses on the outside."

You can also take photos and view them in 3D.

One more thing... 3DS is "also capabale of displaying 3D Hollywood movies".

There are 3D movie trailers at the E3 booth. WB, DreamWorks.

Also Disney.

"Gamers care most about games."

Remember that Project Sora announcement? The one with Sakura?

Well, it was actually established "to create a game specifically for 3DS".

The Queen of Darkness Reborn, says a message on screen.

And to Oppose her, the Goddess of Light and a Lone Angel. It's Kid Icarus. KI Uprising is the full title.

We see him soaring through the sky. He can only fly for five minutes.

Wings are all purply and glowy. Rawk guitars. Reminiscent of Ulysses 31.

Icy environments, flying enemies, bow and arrow, castles, lava, giant bosses, SPACE aaa aaaaa

Soaring into the sunset. "Let Your Wings Shine!" OK then!

Coming Soon.

Back to 3DS. It searches for wireless access points and responding 3DS systems, and communicates without you knowing, even with the lid close.

Nintendogs had a similar feature, but communication stopped if users started playing another game.

3DS is different.

Even when you are not near a wifi access point, you may discover new rankings, stages etc. have been downloaded.

And ghosts.

There is no need to pay a monthly fee for the online functionality.

Back to the games now.

Miyamoto is working on 3D versions of Nintendogs.

It has got cats! Kinectimals! No wait.

3DS software from third-parties - Harmonix, EA, Ubi, WB, SEGA, Take 2, THQ, Konami, Hudson, Namco, Capcom, Activision...

DJ Hero 3D, Kingdom Hearts 3D, Saints Row, Madden.

Samurai Warriors, Resident Evil, Batman, Assassin's Creed

Riiiiiiiiiidge Racer, Metal Gear Solid.

Level 5, Majesco also in. 3D Cooking Mama??? 3D WOMEN'S MURDER CLUB 2???? We can only hope.

It's the end. Proper clapping.

But first - a video of what devs think of 3DS. Kojima excited.

Inafune says "it is very attractive".

Kojima experimenting with MGS. "It's a jungle, there are things in front of you, away from you and even further down."

Inafune: "I think 3D makes players wonder what is at the end of the hallway."

End of video. Return of Reggie.

"When we began this morning, we promised something for everyone..." FreeDS?

Nah.

More content coming up on Nintendo.com. And on Eurogamer, promise.

There's no way to demo the 3DS on stage, so they've decided to communicate it in a different way. With a video!

It's of Iwata. He pulls a 3DS out. CGI Mario jumps out of the screen then pulls him in with him.

Miyamoto walks up. Picks up 3DS. A bloody dog jumps out. It pulls him into the 3DS.

Zelda swords and shields, DK barrels, red shells all pop out of 3DS. Reggie comes along. Gold coins and mushrooms burst out. He picks up the 3DS and sees Iwata and MIyamoto running along a bridge, chased by Bowser.

Bowser emerges from 3DS and firebreathese Reggie.

He's come back on stage in a burned up jacked. "Well, that sure felt real to me!"

A load of women coming out with 3DSes.

There's bloody hundreds of them. They have 3DSes attached to them. I wonder if they will all see another sunrise.

This is bananas. It's like being confronted by a thousand clones of Judith out of Tomorrow's World.

It's like women holding 3DSes are taking over the world. They're like hot cybermen.

The women are marching out of the theatre. Now Wiis are raising out of the stage. They've got Zelda on the screen. The shuttles to Sony don't start leaving till 11. Sony will be pleased.

It's the end.

Bananas.

And actual bananas! In Donkey Kong Country!

There's a scrum for those Wiis at the front of the stage. We're off outside to see if those women have been torn to pieces yet. See you at noon PST for Sony!