EG meets Konnie Huq

Would it involve playing on the Wii all night? Would there be interaction? Verbal? Because if it's non-verbal, that's fine. I wouldn't have to do anything but do that [mimes using a controller].

Haha! I sound like a real bitch now, thanks. Um, I don't know. Am I, like, striking deals here? I'll get back to you on that.

Oh, it was this woman from News of the World, she was pissing me off. All she kept asking was, "What are you like in bed?" I was like, "I don't have to answer that," and she said, "You're not on Blue Peter now, you have to chill out."

She was a psycho-freak interviewer from hell. So just to shut her up, I said, 'Okay, I've got whips in my wardrobe, and a dungeon.'

But your readers would probably like that, wouldn't they? So just put that I do. There's nothing wrong with lying. We all lie, it's fine.

It happened back when the BBC were apologising for everything left, right and centre, and I was the face of BBC shame, because of the phone-in scandal - which was a genuine mistake. It was a phone-in for an appeal, it wasn't like we were lining our pockets.

No. I had given a quote for the London Freewheel Cycling event - "Cycling is fun and healthy for all the family," sort of thing. That's a mayor of London initiative, and Ken was mayor at the time, though they're doing it again this year under Boris.

Some Tory MP went to the BBC and said, "Oh, that means Konnie's politically offiliated." They were running scared so they apologised on my behalf. Then to redress the balance I said, "Look, I think Boris is great, he's really funny on Have I Got News For You," blah blah.

Then these interviewers, they like to take it all back to the base, don't they? Like your bed-wed thing. So I said, "I suppose Boris's hair is quite cute and floppy." That's all. I didn't say anything about his face or whatever. He's got good hair.

Wuv? Does he mean love?

He's allowed to be dyslexic. Is he fit?

Wed, bed or push off a cliff?

Ha! See, it's not as easy as you think!

Why wouldn't you wed him? Is he a bit of an arsehole? Imagine if you wrote that: "Yeah, he's a bit of an arsehole, honestly speaking." Have you got a picture?

What does he look like? Is he a complete computer geek?

I'm going to check out your website. I'll email him.