Retrospective: Tony Hawk's Pro Skater 2

As an aside, what on Earth is this year's Tony Hawk: RIDE? Does it even know it's a videogame? I was originally going to say something about how RIDE 2 will come with an even more advanced peripheral with working wheels known as the Activision Realboard(TM) and that the included game DVD will fold out into a series of rails to distribute around your garden, but it's too obvious a joke now. However, I would love to meet the demographic Activision is aiming for with RIDE. You know, all those people who enjoy skateboarding games, but what they'd prefer is a mass-produced piece of plastic they can wobble around on top of like a jerk.

But to say THPS2 got the scores it did (choice pullquote: "It's so good it should come with a warning label - or at least some methadone!") because of its interpretation of skateboarding as a game isn't the whole truth. Mostly, it got the score it did because back then Neversoft was capable of creating something that felt tactile to the point of crunchiness, with breathtakingly tricky challenges and perfect controls.

To put it another way, what's the most important part of any skateboarding videogame? If you think it's the falling over, you're half right. If you think it's the getting back up, you're correct. It's certainly not the £60 plastic skateboard.

Failing a trick and faceplanting the ground is an intrinsic part of skateboarding. Its potential occurrence is what makes the activity exciting, and it not happening is your goal for any stunt. Few videogames offer such a stark contrast between success and failure as the almost binary division of skateboarding. You either pull off an amazing stunt, or you fall right on your ass bone and walk funny for the rest of your life.

Therefore in a good skateboarding videogame there's no room for unfairness, awkward controls or soft, unpredictable physics. When the player falls over, they have to know it was their fault. This is what makes you get back up and try a trick over and over for upwards of 10 minutes. This solidity; this knowledge that it's not you versus the game, it's just you.

THPS2 has a world as hard as diamond. It has controls which are easy to learn, take a good dozen hours to master and work 100 per cent of the time. And while its physics are exaggerated, they are consistent. These are the fundamentals you need in a skateboarding game before you can start worrying about quests or destructible environments or Nail The Trick or hospital bills or plot or any of the other ridiculous additions the Tony Hawk's franchise has spent the last few years dicking about with during its downhill jam.

THPS2 has no plot, objectives that made literally no sense, and the PSX version went on to score 98 on Metacritic. Here's what you've got to do, Activision: get Neversoft, put them in a room, sit them down, maybe get them a drink, and write the following on the whiteboard: "Super Tony Hawk's Pro Skater 2". I mean, hey, a guy can dream.